Many books often gush over Java. People want to know, before they learn a language, what the drawbacks are for a language. They want to know what the strenghs are. After all, a computer language is just a tool. We shape our tools, and there after, our tools shape us! This chapter contains a dialog between three Java instructors. The participants are, Professors Good, Bad and Ugly. Professor Good is a strong proponent of Java. Professor Bad is a strong opponent of Java. Professor Ugly has been leaning toward the asthetic analysis of the language, particularly with an eye toward teaching.